Most people have a bladder. I have determined that once a woman becomes pregnant she also spontaneously develops a “Reserve Bladder” and a “Back Up to the Reserve Bladder”, which means after she had gone (which happens about every 20-30 minutes anyway) she returns to whatever she was doing and then 30 seconds later she needs to go again. She once again returns to her previous activities and about 2 minutes later she must go again.

Now you know. And don’t get me started on the part about the intestines.

Crikey!

And the final results are in…

In no particular order…

1) tipped uterus
2) misaligned falopian tube and overy
3) polycystic overies
4) gallstones

What does this mean? Surgery in a couple of months…lots of stuff for pain now…

But you know what? It could have been much worse.

I am at work and there are chocolate brownies on the desk next to mine calling me.

*Crimson* *pause* *Crimsoooon* *longer pause* *CRIMSON!*

I am trying to ignore them but it is hard for me to ignore chocolate particularly when I am salivating like Pavlov’s dog. Some kind soul left them for everyone to share, but I must be strict with myself, I must exert my willpower.

*Crimson, here girl, come here, partake of my chocolatey goodness*

I was slim most of my life until I had my little girl, since I had her I have been up and down, right now I am up, fighting the good fight against temptation. Our father/mother/goddess/divine entity, who art wherever you are, lead me not into temptation, deliver me from brownies, chocolate, ice cream, candy and other sugary substances. For thine is the size 7, the willpower and the glory, Forever and ever eat well. Amen.

*You know you want me*

I will eat my fruits and veggies. I will eat my chicken and fish. I will eat my low fat grains. I will drink my skim milk. I will eat smaller more frequent portions. I will. I will. My will.

*Crimson, NOW!!!*

Sorry brownies, power of will I have over thee.