HomeCRIMSON: Q: If a three legged bathtub flew into your backyard, how many flapjacks could you fit onto an umbrella?
CRIMSON: A: 13, because there are no bones in ice cream.
COWORKER: 13 is incorrect. The correct answer is 1,234,753,478,246,997. Because, Scooby Snack Ice Cream is most definitely filled with bones.
CRIMSON: Aha! You must have talked to Ali Kalababwa to find out the true answer to that question since it has been the secret of many millennia protected and guarded closely by guardians such as myself and Ali. You must never repeat it to anyone as the fate of ice cream world wide now rests in your hands. Welcome to the fold.
COWORKER: I don’t do folds. Too much belly fat.
CRIMSON: Okay, well welcome to the guild then. We are known only to a few well placed and powerful individuals (i.e. G. Bush, Q. Elizabeth, B.B. Ghali, The Pope, and Sylvester Stallone) as the ‘Guild of the Sacred Order of the League of the Society of Boneless Ice Cream Secret Protector Guardians’.
COWORKER: I am sorry but I cannot be part of such an elitist group. I have standards and such an enterprise completely compromises my values. The absolute fact that you discriminate against Scooby Snack Ice Parlour Enterprises and most especially their renowned Chocolaty Bone Marrow flavour I find revolting. Quite frankly I am disappointed with your acceptance into such a “guild” and you affiliating yourself with such riff raff. I am off to consult with Ben and Jerry over this insolence. Don’t even try and stop me. Or you will feel the wrath of a good lei.